Beautiful and Terrifying
| Me: | Damn, their engagement party was just a frape. |
| Tiny Hullian: | I SO wish I'd been there with you when you saw that! |
| Me: | There were heart attacks. Many of them. And then I realised I could turn a profit. |
| Tiny Hullian: | Can you even IMAGINE that shit show?! |
| Me: | I was totally looking forward to it. I was going to give them espresso cups filled with jelly beans. I love me some goddamn weddings. I like to place bets with the other guests about how long it'll last, if the bride is pregnant, and if the in-laws are just pretending to approve. |
| Tiny Hullian: | ESPRESSO CUPS FULL OF JELLYBEANS?! Holy FUCK! What are you going to get me for my wedding? |
| Me: | I don't know; StumbleUpon hasn't given me any ideas epic enough for you yet. |
| Tiny Hullian: | Dawwww! I'd get you industrial amounts of arsenic. |
| Me: | For the perfect honeymoon... |
| Tiny Hullian: | One day, dear, you're going to be the best ex wife anyone ever had. |
| Me: | Or the best widow. |
| Tiny Hullian: | It's conversations like this that make us beautiful and terrifying--like Galadriel. |
#psychiatric assistance necessary
