An American in London with too much time on her hands meanders the Internet, watches a lot of porn, and consumes alcohol.
Then she shares it with you.
The Internet, not the booze.
All I want in a boyfriend is someone who won’t touch me or talk to me, but who periodically checks in to see if I’m okay and brings me food whenever I ask.
A waiter. I just realized I’m looking for a waiter.
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